Monthly Archives: May 2016

WHY I HATE HORSES……

When we moved to Arkansas from Texas, and moved out onto our farm, my parents got us a Shetland pony.  Get them a pony they said.  It’ll be fun, they said.  The kids will love it they said.  Uh-huh.  We named him Poncho.  He was the most unrideable horse ever.  Every time one of us got on him, he took off down the road to our neighbor’s house (the Byrds) and to their luscious garden.  There is nothing like sitting on a horse that is eating someone’s garden up while being shooed away by an angry little old lady! She had to do this several times.  Other times we rode Poncho, he would take us under the clothesline and try to scrape us off there. Sometimes he would just stop under the lines and eat a little while you lay atop him wondering how to get him to do what you want.  The last time I rode him, he bucked me off in the back yard as soon as I got on him, and I landed on some bricks.  I was crying and hollering and Dad came out of the house and got on Poncho!  His feet were almost dragging the ground.  He rode him around the yard (as if to teach him a lesson).  I was skeptical that Poncho had learned his lesson.  You couldn’t get me back on him.  I have since been asked if our parents loved us when I’ve told other people that we had a Shetland pony.  Apparently, it is widely known that they are mean spirited. LOL  Pretty sure my parents knew this.  They probably thought that we were meaner.

WHY MIKE HATES HORSES…….

When Mike was a kid, he and his brothers were out riding their horse, I forget his name.  This horse was gentle, but hated and feared water.  When it came time to cross a little stream, Mike took the rope and was leading the horse across the stream while one or both or his brothers rode across.  When he stepped into the stream, he got his feet stuck, the horse nudged him and he fell face first into the stream.  The horse then crossed the stream by stepping on Mike in two or three places.  The horse never even got his feet wet!  Mike was unhurt having been smashed into the soft mud of the stream.  This is just one reason that Mike hates horses.  Not really sure why horses hate Mike!  LOL

THE BUMBLE BEE INCIDENT….

Episode 904:  Years ago, Mike and his brother Allen, and a former brother-in-law went dove hunting.  I wasn’t there.  Unfortunately, hunting is not my thing.  I would have loved to have been there that day.   They had all had a little luck with the doves, and Mike was no exception.  He shot at one and when the dust cleared, went to retrieve it.  He was the only one who had shot one, so he was in the field alone.  He got to his dove, picked it up, and was immediately attacked by a bumblebee.  It stung him on the arm after he threw the dove at it.  He thought it had lost interest after that until it stung him (in a sneak attack) right in the armpit! He took off  his hat and swatted at it and finally swatted it onto the ground, throwing his hat in the process. Suddenly, the bee starts buzzing and acting like it is not hurt at all, so in desperation, (and typical Mike fashion) he shot it with his shotgun.  Now, keep in mind he is alone in the field, and to the onlookers it looked like he threw his dove up and waved his hat around, then threw it on the ground and then shot his hat!  They were doubled over laughing at his shenanigans. A lot of weird stuff happens to Mike too.  When he got home, he told me had bagged 2 doves and a bumble bee!

THINGS MAMMA SAID…….

Direct quotes.  I really wish I had listened to some of these instead of rolling my eyes……

Take care of your feet.  They are the first thing that wears out.

Stay out of the sun. Wear sunscreen or you’ll look like a raisin.

Act like you love each other. (This was to me and my brothers anytime we went somewhere)

Wear a bra. Someday your boobs will look like a marble in a potato sack.

Moisturize  your face and hands daily.

Make a monthly budget  and stick to it.

And there were many more that won’t come to mind right now.  Words of wisdom, words of nonsense, she was one of a kind.

 

 

 

 

THOSE DARN SNAKES 2…..

EPISODE 2:  One night at about dusk, I was inside watching tv, and Mike was out in the garden.  I got up and walked to the kitchen, turned on the light, and there was a long snake in the kitchen floor.  I said, “woohoo” and jumped back about a foot.  The snake never moved, and I immediately thought,” that prick Mike, has left a rubber snake in here and didn’t even stick around to see my reaction!”.  I try to get the cat interested, thinking she will scare herself with this rubber snake. She wasn’t interested at all.  I reach down to pick it up, and notice that its head is in a different position than before.  I “woohoo” again and rush outside on the porch and holler, “Mike, there’s a snake in the house!”  He comes to the rescue and picks it up and releases it outside.  How did it get in? you ask.  He had left the back door ajar while taking some stuff outside. Weird stuff happens to us.  Not sure why.